


Nothing Left To Lose

by bbluejoseph



Series: The Joshua Tree [2]
Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Bleed Into One, I'm a baby and I'm bad at tagging, Insomnia, Josh highkey needs Tyler back, M/M, i almost cried writing this, this isn't violent?? but I guess it's intense so watch out for that, trench
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-12
Updated: 2019-10-12
Packaged: 2020-10-29 13:47:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,764
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20797595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bbluejoseph/pseuds/bbluejoseph
Summary: The water sloshed him, soaking his clothes, but he fell to his knees and, terrified at what he might see, leaned over the falls.





	Nothing Left To Lose

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Lucywasnothere](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lucywasnothere/gifts).

> Requested by Lucywashere, this is Chapter 42 of bio from Josh’s point of view! Title from With Or Without You by U2

Josh couldn’t sleep. 

He wouldn’t tell Tyler this, but anytime he got taken back to the city, he took sleep with him. Josh would lie awake for hours, staring at the burlap sides of the tent, before finally getting up and sitting by the fire with Clancy. Clancy never left the campfire, certainly not at night, and he understood and sympathized with Josh’s insomnia.

When Tyler was here, it was much easier. Once he was sure Tyler was comfortable, he’d fall asleep--with the boy he loved in his arms, no less. He was a rock in a sea of sleepless nights.

But Tyler wasn’t here now. Josh had turned his back for just a moment, to get some food for them to share, and when he looked back Tyler was gone.

The bishops took people back to the city, sure. If they thought even for a moment that the person had some remaining loyalty to Dema, they’d steal them away. Most people got taken back once or twice, a few not at all. This was Tyler’s fifth kidnapping.

But it was different this time; it was worse. Josh knew Tyler wanted to stay in Trench. He’d proven as much by taking bandito clothes as his own, by shaving his head. His whole attitude was different when he was in Trench, too; he spoke aloud, he helped out around camp, he smiled, he held Josh’s hand. He wanted to stay this time, Josh knew it.

Still, Nico had taken him back, and Josh feared what might happen to Tyler once he was behind city walls. 

He didn’t talk about what happened to him in the city--most didn’t--but it was enough to frighten him terribly, to give him awful nightmares, and to make him flinch away from the touch of others. Josh could tell that a terrible violence had been inflicted upon him, but he didn’t ask about it because he didn’t want to pressure Tyler.

He’d escaped five times. The bishops wouldn’t overlook that.

Josh hadn’t wasted any time upon noticing Tyler was gone. He lit a torch with flames from the campfire, and headed out of the camp.

He was fully prepared to go alone, but he was surprised when Jenna, Debby, and a few others rushed to catch up with him. “We’re coming with you,” Jenna said firmly, grasping a torch of her own in one hand, and Debby’s hand in another. Debby nodded in agreement.

They spent the night searching Trench, wandering in search of the lost bandito. They followed common trail routes, marched as close as they dared to the edge of the city, but there was no sign of Tyler. Nico had a quick stallion; they were probably already back in Dema.

Josh couldn’t give up on him. 

Other banditos in the group came and went, too exhausted to carry on, but Josh wandered the entire night, until his torch burnt out and he could no longer see.

It took some convincing from Jenna to come back to camp, but they assured Josh they’d help him search again in the morning. “You can’t keep going like this,” Jenna said gently. “You’ll pass out. You need rest. We’ll get him back, J. Even if we have to go into the city again.” Josh reluctantly let her lead him back to his tent.

Sleep wouldn’t come. Not without Tyler.

Finally, as dawn broke through the night, Josh gave up on sleep. To hell with it. He just needed to find Tyler. If he found Tyler, everything would be okay.

After throwing on his hoodie and lacing his boots, he stepped out of his tent. Torches weren’t necessary during the day, but he needed some sort of beacon, in case Tyler was farther away. In the supply tent, he pulled handfuls of dried flower petals from a bag, and stuffed them in his pockets. If someone was lost, the others would wander through Trench, leaving a thin trail behind as they went, so the lost person could find them. 

He started when another arm reached around him to grab a handful of petals. Debby looked tired, but maybe a little less so than she had before; he hoped she’d gotten some sleep. “Mind if I join you?”

Josh was too tired to smile, so he clasped her arm for a moment, wanting to show his appreciation. “Please do.”

“I’m coming, too,” added another voice. Josh looked up to see Jenna entering the supply tent, grabbing a handful of petals from the bag. A few other banditos joined her, getting petals of their own. 

There was eight of them, total. Josh led the way out of the tent, and the rest followed.

The banditos never made rescue attempts during the day, although Josh was nearly desperate enough to make an exception. For now, at least, they wandered over a few of the less traveled areas of Trench, places that were out of the way to the bishops. Josh hoped, although it was unlikely, that Tyler had somehow gotten away from Nico and was wandering Trench, trying to find his way back to camp. 

As the sun rose higher and higher, and the banditos went further and further into Trench, the chances of finding Tyler diminished.

All until they approached the edge of the cliffs, overlooking the stream.

A lone figure was crouched by the water, cloaked in yellow. It couldn’t have been anyone else. The figure turned, and Josh shouted his name, and he shouted Josh’s back. Tyler! It was Tyler! A wave of relief washed over him.

He was about to climb down when Jenna rapidly tugged on his sleeve, and pointed upstream. The breath was sucked out his lungs once more as he saw the cloaked figure of Nico riding his stallion into the valley. “Tyler!” Josh shouted, pointing at the bishop, and even from here he could see the other boy’s shoulders sag. 

Nico strode into the valley and stopped before him. Josh couldn’t hear the bishop’s words, but it was clear enough that he was asking Tyler to return to the city with him. 

Josh would have leapt from the side of the cliff, scrambling down the rocky face, if it meant he could get between Nico and Tyler right now. But Jenna had a firm grip on his shoulder, and he knew there was no way he could get down there in time. The second Nico saw the banditos, he’d get to Tyler with no hesitation; he would rather see him dead than rescued again.

He didn’t try to convince Tyler to stay. He didn’t try to signal to him, to plead. He didn’t have to.

“I’m not your son.”

Everything froze.

Tyler’s voice was clear and firm against the soft rustling of the creek. “Dema isn’t my home, and I’m not your son. Everything you’ve ever told me is a lie. You pretend to be high and mighty, and you use your power for abuse.”

Josh’s heart clenched with pain, and his fists clenched with anger, but he stayed still as Tyler finished. “I know what you’ve done, better than anyone. And I’m not going back.”

This was it. This was the moment, the now or never. Josh reached into his pocket, pulled out a fistful of petals, and flung them into the air.

The other banditos followed suit, raining the flowers down onto the figures below. Nico’s horse was distressed; it whinnied and shook its head, lifting its hooves. Even Nico seemed thrown off guard, trying to still his horse while turning his head rapidly to find the cause of the shower. 

Josh’s voice tore free from his throat._ “Run!” ___

_ _Tyler turned and did exactly that. Josh rushed to the edge of the cliff, desperate to help, but he stopped when he heard one of the banditos shriek. Tyler had fallen and quickly been caught up in the water of the creek; Nico, in his pursuit of Tyler, was rushing in the same direction. _ _

_ _The waterfall._ _

_ _In one horrible moment, the water pushed Tyler over the edge of the cliff, with Nico just behind him. _ _

_ _Josh screamed. Josh screamed and stepped right off the edge of the clifftop, half-sliding, half falling to the bottom. His jacket ripped, his hands scraped the rock; he didn’t notice. Managing to land in one piece, he ran to the edge of the falls, gasping for air. No, Tyler. No. _ _

_ _He could hear the banditos calling behind him, trying to get to him, but he couldn’t hear what they were saying. The water sloshed him, soaking his clothes, but he fell to his knees and, terrified at what he might see, leaned over the falls._ _

_ _A small, yellow-cloaked figure stood precariously on a ledge ten feet below him. He was clinging as tightly as he could to the face of the cliff, face pressed to the rock, fingers clutching at the roots of a plant growing a few feet above._ _

_ _“Tyler,” Josh gasped, and slowly, Tyler looked up. His voice was soft and scared. “Josh.”_ _

_ _Immediately, Josh began to cry from a mix of fear and relief. A sob choked him, and he dug his feet into the half-submerged stones, leaning over the edge. “Hold on, please. I’ll pull you up.” _ _

_ _Tyler’s eyes were wide with fear, but he tentatively reached up with one arm. They were close, but not close enough; Josh dared to lean further. _ _

_ _Abruptly, he felt someone grasp the back of his jacket, fingers tightening and twisting. “We’ve got you,” came Jenna’s voice. “We’ve got you, Josh, just a little more”_ _

_ _He was more off the cliff than on it, but all that mattered was reaching Tyler. For a horrifying moment, their fingers brushed, unable to grasp one another, and then Tyler stretched as much as he could, and Josh grabbed his hand tightly. Another sob escaped him._ _

_ _“We’re gonna pull you up on three,” Jenna said from behind him. “One, two, _three!” ____ _

_ _ _ _The banditos dragged Josh back up the cliff, and Josh dragged Tyler in turn, the bandito’s feet struggling to get a foothold in the slippery rock. Josh clutched Tyler’s hand, then his other, then his body as he was pulled back onto the edge, back to safety. _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _They clung to one another tightly, Tyler’s fingers twisting in Josh’s jacket and face pressed as tightly as he could into his shoulder. Josh clung to him just the same, determined to keep him safe. He held Tyler as he shook, and managed a few words through his tears. “I got you. I got you.”_ _ _ _

**Author's Note:**

> I really enjoyed writing this. BIO was always meant to be from Tyler’s point of view, but Josh deserves the spotlight too! I’m starting to explore into his backstory, his thoughts, and his motivation and I’d like to write more about him soon. as always, requests are open if you have any ideas of what you'd like to see from this universe!


End file.
